Hi there!
So I'd like to have something witty to say like my very interesting friends, but let's be honest, it's 12:30 a.m. (yes, a.m. people!!) and I'm sitting on the floor because I don't have a desk to use or chair to sit on, but hey....the floor's nice.....right???
I keep thinking that if anyone really reads this that they might get to know me a little bit better, which might be a bad thing, so I guess we'll see. But at least you might feel a little like you know a little bit of me.
I am currently listening to a new song that I heard on the way home from my parents tonight called "Stop and Stare" from OneRepublic. I had already liked the band a little but now I like them MUCH MORE!! I'm currently in a soft music moment in my life. My life seems to be going very fast and I'm not really sure if I have a lot of control over it (which is hard because I'm a control freak....) so I'm doing the best I can. Or at least I hope so.
I was just thinking that I should put a disclaimer on this thing that says "READ WITH CAUTION". But let's be honest...if you're reading this you probably already know me and nothing I can say would be a shocker to you. So go ahead, read on. No really, go ahead.
I am moving soon and am leaving a lot of people that I really love and am having a hard time with it. As much as I want to stay and do all of the same things with all of these great people, I just can't stay. My life isn't really all I wanted it to be. For the last several years I have wanted something different. Something more. And for whatever reason I haven't been able to have that. I need to try and find that and if that means I need to be a little more proactive, then I will do that. I desperately need to try. I don't want to be without those things in my life anymore. I want to have that complete life. I want to be a wife and a mother. That's all I've ever wanted. And if that means I need to get out there far away from many of the things that I love to find it, then ok. I hope everyone that thinks I'm leaving them will forgive me. It seems that all I ever get when I tell people is the same reply of "WHY?", "You can't go." I don't want people to be sad about it, I want people to be happy. It's like I just took away their favorite thing and am not going to give it back. It's not helping people. It will be ok. Life will go on without me. You've all convinced me to start a blog, so just read all the crazy things I put on here and I'll do the best I can to keep up with it. So wish me luck!! I'm already a little freaked out about it anyway.
I just want to tell everyone that I love them all very much. My life is a very blessed life. I am surrounded by wonderful people. I have intelligent, funny, caring friends and a great family that loves me. How did I get so lucky? So, thank you. From the bottom of my little toes.
I'm going to go to bed now. Tomorrow is a new day and I have lots of things to do so goodnight or good morning. I'll try and write something a little better next time. Oh, and I'll try and put pictures on here for fun.
Love ya tons and tons, plus one.
jenny
4 comments:
It's not that we don't want to be happy for you, Jen, it's just that we like having you around. We're going to miss you a lot. However, I will plaster the smile on my face just for you, my dear. :) And I have to I say, good for you for making the decison to do something about the things in your life that you're not satisfied with.
I'm going to miss you, but when I think of you, I'll just imagine you in a yellow sundress, frolicking in a field of daisies with some tall guy in a sweater vest, laughing with delight. And I'll grin to myself, knowing that you're daisy-field-frolickingly happy. ;)
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
I'll make sure I get that dress ASAP!!
I love you Ali!!
Oh my Jen! I'm going to miss your hugs! Though when I read your blog...I cried. Yes I know, I'm a softie! It makes me so happy that you have the courage to go outside your comfort zone and do something completely outside the box.
In a way I'm doing the same thing...only I'm still holding on to the Church as a safty net. You are my hero! I hope when I get back I can do the same thing as you are and venture out on my own.(after lots of prayer and fasting of course.)
So I hope you will write to me on my mission and tell me of your adventures and I will do the same.
Reeter!
So I really like your blog address, Jen Jen Jennings! Tell everyone what middle name I gave you. Okay fine, don't. I'll tell them. It's Jeniqua. Jennifer Jeniqua Jennings. And you are a jewel! Jenny's Jewels. U B CRAZY! And even though I'll miss you, we'll keep in touch now as fellow bloggers. Mine is rhiasrubbish.
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